Hot flashes accompanied by feelings of shame and guilt

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Diemm

• June 17, 2020 01:49

I'm perimenopausal, and have had hot flashes for three years, off and on, with increasing frequency. Recently, they are coming several times an hour. They are often accompanied by intense feelings of shame, anxiety, guilt - so intense that I just want to crawl out of my body and run away. It's so yucky and uncomfortable. The hot flashes start with a crescendo of feelings of shame and yuckiness, before there is any heat, maybe a full two minutes before I can tell it's a hot flash. I'm grateful when I CAN tell, and can talk myself through the yucky feelings before the heat wave crests and falls away. 
I've been trying to find out if anyone else has this type of reaction to the hormone rush of hot flashes?? My friends are all like, "Hmmm, no."
Is this familiar to anyone??

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  Stasi

  • June 17, 2020 18:39

  Hello Diemm-

  While all women will go through menopause, every women's experience can be unique. I can tell you based on my work with my clients that there are other women who experience something similar to you when it comes to hot flashes. Your ability to recognize these feelings and work through them is one strategy that can work. It sounds like you have had success with this. Here are a few links to articles from our Menopause Learning Library that provide other strategies. 

  • Four ways to beat the heat from hot flashes
  • Menopause hot flashes: you're hot then you're cold, you're "yes" then you're "no"
  • Are my hot flashes getting hotter? Or is it just me?

  It is important to share experiences around menopause symptoms, so there is more conversation around a normal and natural part of every women's life. If others have experiences around hot flashes, please share.

  Stasi Kasianchuk MS, RDN, CSSD, CSCS, EP-C
  Gennev Director of Health Coaching

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  Nickie1971

  • June 25, 2020 04:28

  I have exactly what you are saying. I thought I was loosing my mind and had no idea until my friend came over and helped me through this today. She suggested menopause and it all fits!

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  Stasi

  • June 26, 2020 00:50

  Hi Nickie-

  Thank you for posting this. I am so glad your friend shared with you how these symptoms relate to menopause. So many women suffer, because this isn't discussed enough, even though menopause is natural and every woman will experience it. Have you found anything that can help you manage your hot flashes?

  Stasi Kasianchuk MS, RDN, CSSD, CSCS, EP-C
  Gennev Director of Coaching

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